Paging HR…we may have a situation here

I love our instant messenger program at work. I will not love it when HR comes knocking on my door to fire me over abusing it.

LittleIndian [11:30 AM]:
do you have some time to pretty up a document for me using some sort of software
NoGoodDaddy [11:30 AM]:
?
LittleIndian [11:30 AM]:
non work related
NoGoodDaddy [11:30 AM]:
what is it?
LittleIndian [11:30 AM]:
i have a wedding task to pretty up a two pager folded to make it look prettier explaining an indian wedding
NoGoodDaddy [11:31 AM]:
oh christ
er…oh vishnu
send it over
LittleIndian [11:31 AM] sends:
File
LittleIndian [11:31 AM]:
no change to the wording.. but just the look and adding some color
NoGoodDaddy [11:31 AM]:
aren’t you dark enough?
LittleIndian [11:31 AM]:
any help appreciated
NoGoodDaddy [11:31 AM]:
hi-oh
LittleIndian [11:32 AM]:
brown man taking one of yours in this wedding
victory for the brown team
NoGoodDaddy [11:32 AM]:
dilutes your allegedly superior race…
LittleIndian [11:32 AM]:
we have a billion+ people.. we can afford some lightening of the next generation
NoGoodDaddy [11:33 AM]:
how are you printing these?
and…do you need 4000 of them
LittleIndian [11:34 AM]:
330
printing double sided and then folding then horizontall
on some heavy cream stock
NoGoodDaddy [11:34 AM]:
how are you printing: what kind of printer? home ink jet? copy shop?
igen?
LittleIndian [11:34 AM]:
like 30 lb paper
fedex
kinkos
NoGoodDaddy [11:35 AM]:
because, as even you know…it matters
LittleIndian [11:36 AM]:
prob a laser printer
color
NoGoodDaddy [11:36 AM]:
for example…the little pictures look crappy when printed.
very dot-ish
hi-ph
hi-oh i mean
LittleIndian [11:37 AM]:
i get it .. DOT HEADS
NoGoodDaddy [11:37 AM]:
see how taht works?
where did you get the images? just off the web? they could use to be cleaner…
LittleIndian [11:37 AM]:
yep.. images are off web
NoGoodDaddy [11:38 AM]:
kathy darling…we need your help
LittleIndian [11:38 AM]:
google OHM for cleaner images
and the bottom
JustKathy [11:38 AM]:
what do you need?
NoGoodDaddy [11:38 AM]:
LittleIndian has a wedding program he needs “prettied up”
LittleIndian [11:38 AM]:
and the elphant thing is a Ghanesh
NoGoodDaddy [11:38 AM]:
no sh!t it is
LittleIndian [11:39 AM]:
wohh wohhh easy
NoGoodDaddy [11:39 AM]:
i watch the simpsons…i know who ganesh is
LittleIndian [11:39 AM]:
i had no idea you were that versed
JustKathy [11:39 AM]:
i having a little trouble following this… fill me in
LittleIndian [11:40 AM]:
did you send JustKathy the document ?
NoGoodDaddy [11:40 AM]:
LittleIndian has a program for a hindu wedding that he needs prettied up for us white folk. he’s asked me to add color to it.
JustKathy [11:40 AM]:
okay somebody send it to me
NoGoodDaddy [11:40 AM]:
won’t let me send it
check email
JustKathy [11:43 AM]:
got it. what would you like added? Background color, borders?
LittleIndian [11:43 AM]:
i will let you use your artistic ability to do it
NoGoodDaddy [11:43 AM]:
i would think so…also see if the images can be sharpened
JustKathy [11:43 AM]:
and more importantly, when do you need it by?
LittleIndian [11:43 AM]:
some color
umm. by monday if at all possible
NoGoodDaddy [11:44 AM]:
oh…nice guy you are. no ruch or anything
JustKathy [11:44 AM]:
Any particular color to use or stay away from?
LittleIndian [11:44 AM]:
hey NoGoodDaddy.. im done with you.. kathy has it ..
you can leave now
NoGoodDaddy [11:44 AM]:
brown…lots of brown
LittleIndian [11:44 AM]:
red is good.. gold is good. stay away from green or purple or white
white man leave

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