She bitches about the mosquitoes

Thwack. (I flicked Shmuppie on her head for being a brat or something)
Shmuppie: Ouch…what was that?
Me: A mosquito
S: A Spageeto?
M: No…a Mosquito
S: Spageeto?
M: No, mosquito. Mo…skee…toe. Mosquito
S: Oh…mosquito
JewelrySlut: She’s gonna need more than just speech therapy. She’s gonna need one of those talking keyboard things
S: No, I want an accordion
J: An accordion is an interesting choice.
M: I didn’t know accordions had that technology
S: Yes, Daddy. An Accordion

Thwack (She’d been rude again)
S: What was that?
M: The mosquitoes again
S: Spageeto?
M: No…mosquito
J: Don’t the spageetos live down the block?
M: Yea…they work at LTM (the Mexican restaurant)
S: I’m going to have a baton to conduct the boys in the band
J: A Mariachi band I guess.
At this point, I pushed my place mat aside and put my head on the table to weep quietly.

Yup…dinner at casa NoGoodDaddy.

I decided that I needed to write that down for you all. Hope you enjoyed it.

One note of a job-related nature (and I know I said I wouldn’t post anything but this is good)

So, I had an interview just now for another job at HealthCareRelatedCompany. So, the guy asks “Why do you want to leave your position”
“Because when the project is over to transition out the print room, I’m being terminated”
“What?! Why?!”
“That’s the decision that was made. So, as you can understand, I am looking for a new position”
“What?!”
“So, if it looks like I’m pounding the internal job board, I kinda am”
“Why are they getting rid of you?!”

And so it goes.

Is it wrong to hook up fake, battery operated, security cameras down at the pool? That’s my next idea. Maybe the fear of video will deter some of the kids from trashing the place.

Of course, I know I’m delusional.

8 thoughts on “She bitches about the mosquitoes

  1. If you'd like to borrow a child for a while for a firsthand look at how cute they can be, I know a four year old who is available for hire. Then you too can have conversations about Michael Buble calling your house and the Spageetos and Aidan Wahl who bit Shmuppie, by the way, over a year ago. :-)

  2. I can't wait to have a child. The conversations you share with schmuppie remind me of how cute children can be. It's just the little moments like that… um..Yeah, I always come into your comments section spreading my sappiness. sorry.

  3. El Presidente' You are delusional. Absolute Power corrupts aboslutey. You are turning into a Ronald Regan (And not in a good way). What happens when shit happens and they ask "Well thank god El Presidente out in Cameras!" You'll have to tell them they are fake. Rasie the Pool Fees and get CDC cameras going into a laptap or something? how much would that be?

    Here's a place that sells fake cameras.
    http://www.security2020.com/?gclid=CLLCncu3o4UCFQRoNAodqgFXxA

  4. Dude, put up real security cameras. Then when they sneak into the pool after hours turn them on and put up a webfeed (or whatever the fuck you call them). That way we can ALL enjoy your igit neighbors.

    *THWACK!*

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