It’s time to make fun of the local paper again

You know it’s that time again…it’s time to bash the News and Observer, Raleigh’s newspaper.

This came from the N&O’s website.

From Staff Reports
Bundle up.

We’re in for the coldest temperatures of the season tonight, the National Weather Service says.

The Weather Service forecast calls for an overnight low of 24 degrees in Central North Carolina, which includes the Triangle. Most areas will be at freezing or lower for 12 to 13 hours tonight, according to the Weather Service.

The region hasn’t experienced such widespread cold temperatures since mid-February.

Temperatures during the day are expected to reach a high of only 47 degrees — below the normal high of 53 degrees for the date.

Tuesday also is likely to be chilly, with a high of 50 degrees. Look for a warm-up for the remainder of the week, with forecast highs of 57 on Wednesday, 58 on Thursday and 56 on Friday.

The Weather Service also forecasts a 50 percent chance of rain on Thursday and a 30 percent chance on Friday. But the rainfall is not expected to erase a rainfall deficit that has left the entire state in the grip of record-setting drought.

Winter starts Saturday. The forecast for that day: Partly sunny, with a high near 57.

Let’s look this over:

“The Weather Service forecast calls for an overnight low of 24 degrees in Central North Carolina, which includes the Triangle. Most areas will be at freezing or lower for 12 to 13 hours tonight, according to the Weather Service.”

What? The time between day and night equals between 12 and 13 hours? Who the hell knew?

“The region hasn’t experienced such widespread cold temperatures since mid-February.”
Shocking. Seeing as it’s been Spring, Summer and Fall for pretty much all of the time since then. I’m astounded that it hasn’t been that cold.

“a high of only 47 degrees”

Reason 43628098 to love NC (It’s December 17)

“But the rainfall is not expected to erase a rainfall deficit that has left the entire state in the grip of record-setting drought.”

Let’s see…while flying over Falls Lake this morning, I didn’t see any water. So, the paper feels the need to explain that the rainfall is not enough to replace the roughly 47 billion gallons needed to fill it back up halfway? I’d never have known.

“Winter starts Saturday.”

Thanks. If we’re playing the “Let’s be obvious” Game, let me add one “You are an asshole”

2 thoughts on “It’s time to make fun of the local paper again

  1. Wah wah, I went to Rutgers, wah wah I pick on you because I have a small penis wah wah and I need a way to make myself feel special. Would you like me to send you some cheese and crackers?

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